Unearthing the Gift

This holiday season has been harder for me to get through than others. I’m not someone who hates the holidays, but I am someone who does not want to comply with the expectations of holidays, while at the same time, I want to make this time exciting and fun for my daughters. The holidays bring a lot of feelings to the surface. Don’t get me wrong, I love feelings. But they are heavy sometimes, they are overwhelming sometimes.

In particular the happenings of this year do not make one cheering and full of joy. But I guess every year has it’s good things and bad things, this year just feels especially heavy and dark for me. Which is why I am looking forward to the new year, when hope for better things will be born again. Meanwhile, let’s make it through the rest of the year day by day. There are only 6 days left after all.

Over on my Instagram account I did a 2016 year wrap up spread shared by Vanessa (@arcanum.iter) and it gave me a lot of good information and is helping me close out this year. So I will share that with you on this blog post.

1. Major accomplishments of the year? I got The Moon. In 2016 I delved deep within my own intuition and explored the shadow/unknown sides of my self. I had many reflections assisted by my tarot cards, my crystals, meditations, and my friends/family. I paid more attention to my dreams, I paid more attention to all the ways that Spirit communicates with me in day to day life. I became even more comfortable with living in the mystery.
2. Strength of the year? King of Cups. An interesting card. I went through a lot of emotional growth and development. I had some hard times, and I learned from them.
3. Weakness of the year? Two of Swords. I have gotten this card a few times before. To me it speaks of decision making, and using the power of the mind to cut through the clutter of the outside world, to be able to listen deeper to the within. Interesting how my major accomplishment was to go within and go deeper, and this is also related to my weakness. I just touched the surface, there is so much more to explore.
4. What to release from 2016? King of Coins. Another King, and a lot of masculine energy. When I was doing my journaling about this card I wrote down: “material focus, material fears, material attachments”. In 2016 I was very focused with getting things: getting card decks, getting crystals, getting other spiritual tools. I would really like to not do that in 2017. I would like to expand my knowledge and expand my relationships with the tools I already have. I have struggled a lot with controlling the impulse to buy the newest and coolest decks, or the prettiest crystals. I don’t like that I have decks that I don’t even use, but I bought them for a reason. I’m someone who tends to develop obsessive behaviors, and obsessions with certain things. When I start doing this I know there is something going on, something that I am trying to hide, a hole that I am trying to fill, but it doesn’t work. So my goal for 2017 is to keep that in check, not under control, but in check.
5. Advice for 2017? I got two cards: 8 of Coins and 9 of Coins. These are two very good cards to get. The 8 of Coins shows a woman working on her creative projects, I have my creative projects that I also want to accomplish in 2017. The 9 of Coins is a card about abundance but also about gratitude, about realizing the abundance that we have already been given, and shifting expectations about what abundance looks like. Actually letting go of expectations of what abundance looks like and just occupying our space full of gratitude.

I hope that the holidays are treating you kindly. I have so much hope for 2017 and I want to share that hope with you.